Signs That Identify You As Bullying Parent
Signs That Identify You As Bullying Parent
Do you know that bullying not only takes place at work or school but also at home too? Yes, you read it right! Being a bullying parent is a negative feature of our society; therefore, we must identify them in time and do our best to handle the situation.
While parents are supposed to protect their children and keep them safe, some parents, due to some reason or another, lack the emotional intelligence to maintain control. They end up bullying their child without even realizing it.
Signs that identify you as a Bullying Parent:
Sharing with you few critical signs that will help you identify if you are a bullying parent or not:
Act physically to ensure discipline
Bullying parents’ main characteristic is to use physical means to discipline their children. Do you often spank or slap your child instead of being gentle and understanding? Parents believe physical force might get their child in line; however, it only brings short-term discipline and not long-term good behavior.
Blackmailing using emotional means
Be it any bully, emotional bullying is unknowingly the most preferred way to bully a person. Bullying parents often humiliate, tease, mock, threaten or insult their child making things worse. Emotional bullying lowers the self-esteem of a child and shatters their confidence.
Forcing your kids towards guilt-traps
Do you send your children on guilt trips hoping they will self-discipline themselves? If you blame or shame your children to make them comply with a request or demand, you must stop immediately.
Bullying with negations
Negations may include negative comments regarding their skills, preferences, or anything they say. Children are more sensitive than adults, and parental bullying using negations may seriously impact their mental health.
Invalidating the emotion of a child
Do you often invalidate your child’s emotions or opinions? Then, be alert because this is a big sign that you are acting like a bully parent. Parents must let their children communicate openly with them and let them express their opinions instead of invalidating them.
Encouraging Social Malpractices
Parents who allow social malpractices do understand that you are no less than bullying parents. For example, if you constantly body shame your children because of the foul society around you, you might not know this, but your children may feel unwanted and less loved. Comparing your kid with other children for academic performance, looks, or; other things fall under social malpractice.
What can you do to stop being a bullying parent?
If you have the signs mentioned above of a bully parent, then here are some steps that might help you stop being a bully parent:
Adopt Authoritative parenting
Authoritative parenting style lets your child feel self-reliant and independent within the limits you set.
Be the parent you wanted your parents to be
Do not repeat the way your parents treated you in your childhood for your children. Be the parents you always wanted.
Work on Self-control
If you use physical force on your children, learn self-control. Never be aggressive in front of your children for small things.
Model the behavior you want from your kids
Children often see their parents as role models and behave the same way. Acting abusively, aggressively, or antisocially in front of your children does more harm than you think.
However, always remember that there is no particular style of parenting. It is advisable to consider the consequences of your bullying behavior toward your children.
Final Words:
Children who suffer from parental bullying tend to show aggressive behavior, achieve less, have lower self-esteem, and may become self-destructive.
As a parent, you must know your responsibilities to provide a safe and independent environment for the child to grow. Your child must feel trustable and be open to you. You must provide adequate emotional and physical understanding and support to your children. Always be sensitive and responsive while setting some limits for them.
What’s your opinion on Bullying parent? Any personal experience that you want to share? Share your opinions in the comment section.
This blog post is part of the blog challenge ‘Blogaberry Dazzle’ hosted by Cindy D’Silva and Noor Anand Chawla in collaboration with Mads’ Cookhouse.
Phew… I do bribe them sometimes but all in good faith… Good tips!
I have seen too how parents are being so hard on their ideas that their kids ended up being sop harsh and disrespectful. The feature and the way we can recognize ourselves in this are really recommended too every parent so at they can understand this properly.
Honestly Anasua the parents of our time are so rigid that they dont even accept that their parenting style was wrong and created negative impact on the child’s mental growth. too much trauma and anxiety in majority of the cases turn the child harsh and abusive towards their parents in later part of the time and again for that children are blamed and termed as bad child and parents play the safe card.
Great topic to bring awareness to. Nicely organized. I like how you said be the parent you want your parents to be. Nice way to bring empathy into picture. Perhaps parents should be given a user manual before they take their child home from the hospital. There is very little training on how to be a parent , after all our kids are the future and their emotional well being is important for a growing economy to sustain itself.
I personally feel that self control is the most important virtue as a parent. I tend to yell at my kids when they drive me insane or don’t listen to me. Such a great reminder! Thankfully I am not a bullying parent according to your norms.
Yes Samata, patience is the key but many a times it is just not possible to exhibit it. I yell n hit sometimes although I was never yelled at or never hit in my childhood. I wish to be like my parents n not have ro resort to such measures but sometimes I feel maybe my kids are not like me😛. But whatever the case… o excuses n I agree with most of what u have written n it is a great reminder and maybe an eye opener for many parents.
Oh my! Such a wonderful article that needs to be highlighted to parents. Such kind of awareness can help increase us to be the parents we’ve always wanted to be. It’s so easy to get carried away being the leader/powerful person in the house, and not realising that some of our actions can be derailing to our young-loved ones already.
I am not yet a parent but I agree with your post. Now a days kids have a different approach to life and bullying them will only make them more depressive and rebellious. I have a sister who is in her teens now and the emotions ups and downs she is going through is so different. Her mom and I have the approach of being a friend to her but at the same time we have to discipline her with practical approaches.
This is very helpful for parents- a lot of them may not even realize they are doing this. It is good to identify what behaviours can be seen as bullying their own child
Yes I do yell after soft speaking at least 3 times😁 Then only work it. But not often. Your article is really good and eye opener. Many parents goes through this. Self control and patience is the key.
I totally agree with you. There are many bullying parents and they think spare the rod spoils the child even in 2023. I have never raised my hand on my kids and hate it when I see parents doing it. I see mothers worried about bullying ins school but do not realise how much they bully their children. Your tips are really very useful. I hope many parents read this post and learn from it.
Luckily, my parents have had a soft approach. They gave us all the freedom we needed and then became like children themselves. I am blessed to have never faced bullying.
As parents we want the best for our kids but sometimes our right isn’t their right. I agree that we must never invalidate their feelings and be more receptive and understanding. No matter how wrong, we must handle them and their mistakes softly.
Reading tru I was like check mark on each point, these are definitely some good words of wisdom you have put down, now days being busy parents lack patience and timw and this becomes their alternative method, Im sure ur post will serve as a good eye opener.
My parents were quite strict when I was a child but never bullies. There is a fine line that can get crossed. I feel as long as parents are aware of it, they would never be bullies.
A wonderfully post of how empathic parenting would help the young children become superhero of their life. 👍
This post is surely an eye-opener. And I’m scared to admit there are a few points of a bully parent that I do exhibit and after reading your post I feel like rectifying my ways. Will hopefully not lose my temper with my children henceforth, but I guess social media and the current generation are harder to deal with than we were as kids.
Your article is an eye-opener to all parents. It’s important to acknowledge that parenting is a difficult job, and many parents may struggle with maintaining control and discipline. However, resorting to physical force as a punishment is never the answer. It’s crucial for parents to understand that using physical means to discipline their children can have detrimental effects on their mental and emotional well-being. Instead, parents should focus on cultivating healthy and respectful relationships with their children based on effective communication and understanding. This approach can lead to long-term positive behavior in children and create a nurturing environment where they feel safe and loved. As a society, we must support and educate parents to ensure they have the necessary emotional intelligence and resources to provide the best possible care for their children.
In our times, parenting was very different from that it is now. Back then it was okay to hit kids but now we see what adverse effects it has on children. A very important post.
Sometimes. even I’m guilty of being a bully. Of course, I quickly resort to peace and don the gentle mom avatar and come back with lots of hugs and cuddles 🙂
Loved the topic of this post. It is a great way spread awarness and prevent the bully. I am thankful that I have blessed with amazing supportive parents and may be that’s why I see my sister is raising her child in a great way. It is important to being a great parents so that your kids will learn that lesson from you too.
An interesting post. I agree with the tips shared.